WELCOME TO SINGLISH-DIALECT DICTIONARY

May be useful explanation for some terms unique to some S'poreans esp those in the SAF. Some of these terms are really for the advanced users of Singlish. I think I can master the use of some of the terms correctly, too cheem for me liao.

1) "Ah Then?" - In other words, "isn't it obvious?" A rhetorical question used to express disgust atthe listener's stupidity in grasping the obvious. For example:
Ah Mao: "Go World Trade Centre can take 61 meh?"
Ah Kow: "Ah then? Of cos lah!"

2) Arrow - Means: to be given a task by your superior that you don't want to do. Can also mean that you have been allocated a task in your absence Examples:
"Wow lau! My boss "arrow" me to do this job. I very pek chek leh!!"
"You sabo king ! Just because I never come for meeting you arrow me to do this report!"

3) Bak chew tah stamp/sai - Which literally means "eye stuck with a stamp / smeared with shit."Connotative meaning is "very blind."
e.g. "Wahliao ayy! His girlfriend so argly, bakchew tah stamp!"
e.g. "She so happening! He like tek ko she really bakchew tah sai!"

4) "Bo Eng Lah!" - Meaning: Not free or can't be bothered.
e.g. "Aiyoh! So many things to do. Go bowling? Boh eng lah!"

5) "Borrow Me" - Commonly used by Singaporeans of the Ah-beng and Ah-lian species. It means "lend" and is usually used in the context of a request.
e.g.Ah-Beng: "Eh, my Brylcream don't know go where.Can you 'borrow me' your hairgel?"

6) Buey tahan - Translation (hokkien): Cannot take the pressure or cannot solve problem.
Eg. Student 1: "Wah lao eh, this exam I really 'buey tahan' it lah. Soooo many questions I don't know.
Student 2: "Yah lor... I also want to beng san already."

7) "Can" - Often used to praise someone for something specific. Origin: Mandarin. (eg. "Ni zhen xing!")
Eg. Ah-Kow: "You so fast finish your homework already ah. You very the can, man!"
N.B. Can also be used without "the"
Eg. "Wah, you very can!"

8) Catch No Ball! - Meaning: Don't understand
Example: "Can you repeat that again? I catch noball leh!"

9) "Cham Siong" - Means to compromise (usually to get out of trouble)
Example: Ah Lian to an ow ka (traffic police)who is giving her a ticket:"Why like that, can cham siong or not?"

10) "Cher" - A quick way of calling "teacher". Most prominently heard from secondary school students.
Eg. Student A: "Cher cher! Can I go to the loo?"
Teacher : "Go lah go lah!"

11) Chiminology - Definition: To describe difficult words such that one cannot understand
Eg. Ah Beng: "Ooi! What you say I don't understand lah, stop using those chiminology can or not!"
Ah Seng: "When writing, must use some chiminology, then teacher will think that I am very educated mah."

12) "Diam" - Origin : Malay An English equivalant would be 'be quiet!'
For example: "Diam Diam! You had better be good or mummy will butcher you!"
"Diam Diam" is the same as Diam, except it is more serious.

13) "Lom Pang" - Usually used as an expression to request a favour from someone who might be going your way.
Eg. "My bicycle broke down today, can lom pang your car to work today or not.."
"Since you are going out for lunch, can I lompang you to buy me some cheeken lice (rice)?"

14) Fli-end - The Singaporean equivalent of buddy or mate, or it can be used by kids to mean 'befriend'.
Eg. "Fli-end, you better not come round here anymore or else I wah-lap you."
"If you fliend Ah kaw then I don't fliend you."

15) Hao Lian - Meaning: vain beyond belief
Eg: "Mai hao lian lah! Who's going to look at you?!"

16) Jia Lat! - Means: very serious; prefixed with see-peh; to make it even more serious.
Example: "Jia-lat man! Exam this time sure failwan."

17) Jheelo - Meaning: zero
Eg: " The G in the shopping centre lift stand for what ah??"
"Ai ya !! Stoopid lah you!!! G stand for Gerolor!!!"

18) Jude - It's a word commonly use by buayas (color wolf). No known sources where it is from. It's actual meaning is pretty or rather sweet indescription of a girl (female human being).
Eg. "Ooi, Ah Leng !! Look there!!! You see that girl walking across the Atrium, wah-lau, damn jude man !!!"

19) Gan-Jeong - Meaning: to be hurried, flustered, uptight
Eg. "The MRT door heaven open yet, you so gan-jeong for whaaaat!"
"Now only April, November then exam, why so gan-jeong?"

20) Kee Chia - Explanation: Up the lorry (literal) Other meaning: Die!!!
Usage: "Wah-piang eh! Tomorrow got test leh,haven't prepare yet, so kee Chia !!!"

21) "Gana sai" - Meaning - literal "to be stained by SHIT". Is used to comment that a person has done something to thoroughly embarass/disgrace himself
Eg. "Wah lao! His singing so terok but still action on stage, really ganasai, man!"

22) Lem Bek - Meaning: To be laggi weak physically..(Warning: Could be sexually offensive so please be lem bek just this once-use with care !)Origin: (probably) Malay
eg. "Aiyoh! Why he everything cannot do one...so lem bek!"

23) Lerf - Meaning: love
Eg. "Darling ah... I lerf you for-efer you know?Donch leaf me hor?"

24) On The Ball - To decribe a person for exceptionally hardworking.
Eg. "Why you so on the ball, spoil the market..."

25) "Obiang" - Adjective: meaning ugly, especially for ah-lian/ah-beng category of people
Example: "Wah lau, your sister really look Obiang, man."

26) Pai-seh - Meaning: Apologetic with embarassment and some shyness! Origin: Hokkien
Examples: "Today you pay for dinner again huh,so pai seh!"
"Eh, Ah Seng fart in the lift one-not scared of pai seh!"

27) Pa-jiao - Literal translation: Beat Bird Can be dirty at time, so be careful of its usage English equivalent: Blind
Eg. "Look at the plane in the sky!"
"Where?"
"You pa-jiao one is it! There!!!"
"Oh There..."

28) Sa Kah - Meaning : to flatter someone, get into someone's good side
Eg. "I know you are want to get good grades, but for goodness sake, not sakah until like that lah!"

29) "Sud" - Meaning: so shiok you feel almost invincible
Eg. "Wah! You very sart, ah! Win lottery now can spend! Can lend me money or not?"

30) "See-Bei" - English Transalation: VERY!!!!! Usage : Usually used by true-blue singaporeans to replace the "colonial scums" word, VERY. This highly versatile replacement can be used in almost any sentance which requires the word, very. Best used with other singlish words, like siong, sian, jar lat, etc...
Egs: "Wah lau!! That 5bx see-bei siong ah!!! Can die!!! Kar-n*-**!!"
"Miss Chin's philo lecture see-bei sian! Almost hung myself!!"
"Eh! Ah Gao! You got buy the flower for Ah Huay or not?? Don't have, ah!! See-bei jarlat!!!"
CAUTION!!: Even though this wonderful word is fairly versatile, new users should be warned that there are some instances where a replacement may be inappropiate. For example, see-bei euphonious just doesn't kick!Or like Ah Gao would say.. see-bei buay gam!!

31) "See gin nah" - Meaning : "see" meaning die in hokkien "gin nah"meaning children or kids in hokkien.Used to scold someone who got you in trouble, saboed you, did you in justice or just simply irritates you!
Example: "See gin nah, you. Try to be funny right? Wait till I get my hands on you."

32) Seik bai - English equivalent: mission failed Usage: usually use to describe a failure or loser.
e.g. "Sooo simple job also cannot do, you relly 'seik bai',now."

33) "Siao Liao" - 1st meaning: crazy, out of his mind
Eg. "I think he siao liao, so on for what? Never ask you to do you still go and do!!"
2nd meaning: expression used before or after 'disaster'. A.k.a. die lah!
Eg. "This time siao liao! Got assignment to hand in tomorrow still haven't do!"

34) Solid siah! - Meaning: Simply great, superb!
For example,Ah Mao: "Did you watch the football match last night?"
Ah Kow: "Got lar! That Abbas Saad dem _solid siah! That beautiful goal he kicked in saved the Lions man!"

35) Spoil The Market - Meaning: Raise the standard (of something) to an unacceptably high level.
Example: "His project do until so solid... spoil the market only!"

36) "Swah-ku" - Origin: Hokkien word Translation: Mountain tortoise. Meaning: To tell someone that he/she is not well inform or not knowledgeable.
Example: "What! Aiyah, sooo simple you also don't know. So very swah-kuone!"

37) Toaw Kong - Meaning Very Good or Very Solid.
Ah Beng 1: "You see her legs... Toaw Gong man!"
Ah Beng 2: "No... her body more Toaw Gong!"
Ah Beng 3: "No Lah... what u talking, that one is my Mother Lah...!"

38) Tum-Sim - Meaning: Greedy.You know that you're tum-sim when:
1.You buy $1.50 rojak and ask for all tow-pok and yew char kuay.
2.You pay $80 for a trip to Phuket and demand they serve lobsters.
3.You don't pay attention to discounts less than 40%.
4.You will buy 12 ovaltines to get 1 free. (And redeem the gift hankerchief at the counter)
5.You rent out your 3-bedroom apartment to 12 people.
6.Your picture is hung at the Marina seafood center with the words "do not admit" embossed on it.
7.Your income tax returns is $1.27 and you insist the government should sell you Telecoms shares at a discount.
8.You pay 60 cents for a bus trip from Mandai to Pasir Ris.
9.You want to pay $10 for a COE and expect the road to have no traffic jams..
10.You bought a $4.50 T-shirt from Chinatown and ask for a written warranty.

39) "Wah piang eh" Meaning: what the heck. (similiar 2 wah lau; said when the person is frustrated.)
Example: "Wah piang eh! So suay ah. Why I always kanna tekan?"

40) "Wenla" Expresion which implies that something will not happen, as in the conversation below:
A: "Hey, do you think it will rain?"
B: "Aiyah, Wenla!"

41) Xiam - To mean get out of the way or having avoided something unpleasant
E.g. "Xiam! Xiam! Shio ah!" (used by the hawker)
E.g. Neng tiao (officer): "Call seow eh wash toylet. Wa boh kenna, xiam tiok see pei heng ah!"

42) You Thot (another version)
Sergeant: "Ooi!! You *?*&?. What the *&*& areyou doing here!? You're suppose to be prowling, not sleeping.
"Private : "I thot Ah Kao was on the prowl now.
"Sergeant: "Yes, You thot, I think, Who confirm?"

43) Z-Monster - Meaning: An army term used with relation to being sleepy.
Usage: SGT: "Recruit, cannot fight theZ-monster, right?"
Recruit: "No!! SGT!!!"
SGT: "Ne'ber mind, go and support the wall."

Choosing Name

Ladies n gentlemen - so be careful when you choose a name.

Anne Chang (in Mandarin) - dirty
Anne Chin (in Mandarin) - keep quiet
Faye Chen (in Mandarin) - dusty
Carl Chng (in Hokkien) - buttock
Monica Cheng (in Hokkien) - touching your buttocks
Michael Tan (in Cantonese) - selling eggs
Tommy Huang (in Mandarin) - Tang2 Ming2 Huang2 - Ming Dynasty's emperor
Lucy Liaw (in Hokkien) - You are dead
Judy Soo (in Malay) - Lost in Gamble
Jane Tan (in Mandarin) - Fried egg
Suzie Leow (in Hokkien) - Lost till death
Henry Tan (in Hokkien) - let you wait
Henry Mah (in Mandarin) - hate your mum
Corrine Tai (in Hokkien) - Poor fellow
Paul Chan (in Mandarin) - bankrupt
Nelson Tan (in Mandarin) - bird laying eggs
Jason Tan (in Mandarin) - thief laying eggs
Leslie Tong (in Mandarin) - rubbish bin
Nelson Chong (in Mandarin) - bird infested worms
Carmen Teng (in Hokkien) - Leg Hair long
Connie Mah (in Cantonese) - Call your mum
Francis Yip (in Cantonese) - Sweet potato leaf

Stress Reliever

Stress Reliever # 1
WIFE : You always carry my photo in your wallet to the office. Why?
HUBBY : When there is a problem, no matter how impossible, I look at your picture and the problem disappears.
WIFE : You see, how miraculous and powerful I am for you?
HUBBY : Yes, I see your picture and say to myself, "What other problem can there be greater than this one?"

Stress Reliever # 2
GIRL : When we get married, I want to share all your worries, troubles and lighten your burden.
BOY : It's very kind of you, darling, But I don't have any worries or troubles.
GIRL : Well that's because we aren't married yet.

Stress Reliever # 3
SON : Mum, when I was on the bus with Dad this morning, he told me to give up seat to a lady.
MUM : Well, you have done the right thing.
SON : But mum, I was sitting on daddy's lap.

Stress Reliever # 4
Wife to husband : "What's your excuse for coming home at this time of the night?"
Husband to wife : "Golfing with friends, my dear."
Wife to husband : "What ? At 2 a.m. ?!"
Husband to wife : "Yes, We used night clubs."

Stress Reliever # 5
A newly married man asked his wife, "Would u have married me if my father hadn't left me a fortune?" "Honey," the woman replied sweetly, "I'd have married you NO MATTER WHO LEFT YOU A FORTUNE."

Stress Reliever # 6
Father to son after exam: "let me see your report card."
Son : "My friend just borrowed if. He wants to scare his parents."

Stress Reliever # 7
"How was your blind date?" a college student asked her roommate."Terrible!" the roommate answered. "He showed up in his 1932 Rolls Royce." "Wow! That's a very expensive car. What's so bad about that?" "He was the original owner."

Stress Reliever # 8
In a tiny village lived an old maid. In spite of her old age, she was still a virgin. She was very proud of it. She knew her last days were getting closer, so she told the local undertaker that she wanted the following inscription on her tombstone:"Born as a virgin, lived as a virgin, died as a virgin." Not long after, the old maid died peacefully, and the undertaker told his men what the lady had said.The men went to carve it in, but as the lazy no-goods they were, they thought the inscription to be unnecessarily long.They simply wrote: "Returned unopened."

Ah Huay's Interview

Ah Huay went for a job interview to be a secretary. When the manager saw Ah Huay's colourful attire and gold-&-white highlighted hair, his mind is screaming "NOT THIS WOMAN". Nevertheless, he still had to entertain Ah Huay. So, he told Ah Huay, "If you could form a sentence using the words that I give you, then maybe I will give you a chance!. The words are GREEN, PINK, YELLOW, BLUE, WHITE, PURPLE and BLACK".

Ah Huay thought for a while and said : "I hear the phone GREEN, GREEN, GREEN, then I go and PINK up the phone, I say YELLOW... BLUE's that? WHITE did you say? Aiyah, wrong number, lah... Don't PURPLEly disturb people and don't call BLACK, ok? Kum Siah. " The Manager fainted.

Old jokes from the past

BOY : Since we met, I can't eat or drink...
GIRL : Why not ??
BOY : I'm broke.

BOY : May I hold your hand?
GIRL : No thanks, it isn't heavy.

GIRL : Did you miss me while I was away?
BOY : Were you away?

GIRL : Who was that girl I saw you kissing last night?
BOY : What time was it?

GIRL : Say you love me! Say you love me!
BOY : You love me...

GIRL : If we become engaged will you give me a ring?
BOY : Sure, what's your phone number?

GIRL : I think the poorest people are the happiest..
BOY : Then marry me and we'll be the happiest couple.

WIFE : Do you remember when you proposed to me I was so overwhelmed, I couldn't speak for an hour..
HUSBAND : Yes Darling, that was the happiest hour of mylife...

1st MAN : I'm worried about my daughter. She keeps being chased by the doctor.
2nd MAN : Has she tried an apple?

GIRL : Darling, I want to dance like this forever..
BOY : Don't you ever want to improve?

BOY : I love you and I could die for you!
GIRL : How soon?

BOY : I would go to the end of the world for you!
GIRL : Yes, but would you stay there?

GIRL1 : Have you ever had a hot passionate, burning kiss?
GIRL2 : I did once. He'd forgotten to take the cigarette out of his mouth.

MAN : You remind me of the sea.
WOMAN : Because I'm wild, romantic and exciting?
MAN : NO, because you make me sick.

WIFE : You tell a man something, it goes in one ear and comes out of the other.
HUSBAND : You tell a woman something, it goes in both ears and come out of the mouth.

MARY : John says I'm pretty. Andy says I'm ugly. What do u think, Peter?
PETER : A bit of both. I think you're pretty ugly.

PETER : Mom, does God use our bathroom?
MUM : No, Peter. Why?
PETER : Because Daddy bangs on the door every morning and yells, "Oh God, are you still there?"

CUSTOMER : How much is that tie?
SALESMAN : Forty dollars.
CUSTOMER : Why, I can buy a pair of shoes with that much money.
SALESMAN : But how would a pair of shoes look aroundyour neck.

JIMMY : Mom, can I have two pieces of cake?
MOM : Certainly. Take this piece and cut it in two.

WOMAN : How can I ever repay you for your kindness and consideration to me?
MAN : By cheque, money order or cash.

SAM : I hate to see a girl standing in a bus when I'm comfortably seated.
LILY : So what do you do?
SAM : I close my eyes.

TEACHER : Have you given the goldfish fresh water?
PUPIL : No, Sir. They haven't finished the water I gave them last week.

MOM : Why are you wiping the floor with that cake?
SON : Well, it's a sponge cake, isn't it?

MAN : I'm new around here. Will you please direct me to the bank?
LITTLE BOY : I will, but only if you pay me ten dollars.
MAN : Why should I pay you so much?
LITTY BOY : Because bank directors are always highly paid.

It was Christmas and the judge was in a benevolent mood as he questioned the prisoner."What are you charged with?" he asked."Doing my Christmas shopping early," replied the defendant. "That's no offense," replied the judge."How early were you doing this shopping?""Before the store opened," countered the prisoner.